Goodbye To My Hero

Yesterday the world lost a truly remarkable woman. My grandmother, great grandmother to be exact, left us to join my grandpa up above. She lived 92 great years, almost 93. In her 92 years of life, she managed to touch so many souls. Our whole family is grief stricken but we all know that the past couple of month were hard on Gram. She wouldn't want to suffer or for her quality of life to diminish. She left this world peacefully and now she is our new angel.

Few people can say that they got to spend 29 years with their Great Grandparent. I am lucky, I can say that. And this bond that I had with her, I don't think that I can write it down in words. Even though we may not have spoken a lot over the past years, I still felt more love from her than I ever did. I am so blessed to have been influenced by such a loving lady. Anyone that has known her can say they are blessed to have known her.

My grandparents spent their winters in Florida. I remember being an itty bitty girl and waiting for the day they would come home. They lived right around the corner from us and my little feet couldn't get me to their house fast enough. Even when I was little, I knew that she was my best friend. Her being home meant that I had someone to fill my days full of fun again. That first day that they would be home I would be so excited to see them. To walk into their house, smell grandpa's pipe and the smell of Grandma's skin. She would bring us back little gifts every year, something little that said "Florida" on it or even a seashell, or something she made with her friends at the RV park they lived in for 1/2 the year. It didn't matter if she didn't bring something home, even then, I was just glad she was. I can't tell you how many nights I would stay at her house and wake up to the site of her doing a word puzzle in her chair. She would make me runny eggs for breakfast (my family will tell you that grandma made the snottiest eggs ever, gross to think of, but we ate them like they were the best thing that came out of a frying pan) and 1/2 of a grapefruit. That was tradition at her house, just like sitting at her dinning room table and making necklaces out of the thousands of beads that she had for us granddaughters to use. And that kitchen table had countless hands of Skip-Bo played at it. I remember one day, her and I sat there and played with decks of 50 cards each, and once we were done, she let me talk her into playing again. Grandma was a great gardener. The garden in the back of her house seemed so huge when I was little. She grew so many vegetables. I still can recall going out and picking green beans with her and she would snack on them as we put them in the bags. I thought it was gross that bugs probably had crawled all over them yet my gram didn't care, it was all a part of nature to her. Then later that night, my mom and grandma Kathy, Gram Mayhew and I sat on her back porch and snapped the ends off the beans. Simple things like that I remember.

My grandma Mayhew was the most active senior citizen that I knew. When I was little, she used to come over to our house every night after dinner and I would wait by the side of the road. She would pull up in her 3 wheel bike with the basket in the back. I would hop up in the basket, and grandma would drive me a couple miles up the road and back. I remember the squeak of her seat as she had to put all of her strength swaying back and forth to gain momentum to pull my big bum as I would just sit back and relax, feel the summer wind in my hair. At that point, she was close to 70 doing that. Can you imagine? She did this until I could no longer fit in the basket. After that, I would ride my bike with her. Up to the Corning Road and back. I can't remember our conversations, I just can remember how I felt that I was safe from everything when I was with her.

There are so many memories I have with her. The two that I want to share are always fresh in my mind.

The first was the day that my Grandparents left for Florida. This time, they would not be returning. The drive back and forth was becoming too taxing on their bodies, and even the spring and fall were too cold for them. They had sold there house and packed up some stuff, the rest to be sold at an auction. I remember crying in my room all day thinking it would be the last time I would ever see them. Florida felt like it was worlds away from Rensselaer Falls. But when we went over to say goodbye, Gram took me aside and told me I would never be more than a phone call away. That we would see each other soon. I remember that last hug as we were standing in her house. The smell of her clothes, my grandfather sitting in his chair smoking his pipe. I tried to take everything in. I knew from that point, everything would change. But I knew Gram would stay in touch, she loved us that much.

The second memory that I cling to brings me back 11 years ago, almost 12. Graduation day, 1997. Waiting outside the Auditorium, my mom told me I had to go inside for a minute. I remember how annoyed I was because we weren't suppose to go in there, to wait for the music to cue us to begin our entry to take our diplomas. Anyways, I went with her. Through hundreds of people, my mom finally stopped me and pointed up in the bleachers. There she was with a big smile on her face. My grandma had come all the way from Florida by herself to be there for my graduation. It was a surprise. The best surprise I have ever gotten. I was so proud to have her there to witness me graduate. I really couldn't believe she was there. It was just another way Gram showed me just how much she loved me. She stayed in town for about a week and then returned to Florida and to my Grandpa. The next day Grandpa suffered a major stroke and shortly after he passed away. The following week, Gram made the trip up to NY again to bury her husband. I always felt guilty for this. If she didn't come up for my graduation, maybe she would have been with my Grandpa and could have seen the signs of the stroke coming. Even if she hadn't been able to do anything about it, at least she would have had that last week with him. 2 years ago when Grandma came up for her last visit, her and I went to the cemetery to put flowers on the grave. Later that morning at breakfast, I told Gram how guilty I had always felt about her being up with us and Grandpa having the stroke. My Gram never spoke sternly to me my whole life, except this one morning. She told me that Grandpa would have passed whether she was there or not. That he had the option to come up for graduation too, he just wasn't feeling well for the trip. She said I was to never feel guilty because she wanted to be there, that she wouldn't have missed seeing me graduate for the world. And after that small scolding, I didn't feel so guilty. But that was my Gram...always making others feel better. Here I was feeling guilty, and she would have none of it.

She was loving, caring, and the nicest lady I have ever met. I like to think that I have about 1/2 of her heart, that is still saying I have a big one. She was the most positive person, never talking bad about anyone or anything. My Aunt Bonnie and I were talking last night, and between the two of us, we can't remember her ever speaking ill thoughts about others. How often do you find that? You don't. My Grandma Mayhew was one of a kind. There will never be another person like her. She was the rock of our family, and now she is gone. She has instilled enough love in all of us to show us how to live the rest of our lives like we should. Loving our family, cherishing every moment we have and living life to the fullest. She never stopped, never gave up. Even when she was 90, she was still volunteering at a pregnancy care clinic, then coming home and riding 3 miles on her bike. Who does this? She did, that's all I know. My heart is hurting but I do know that Gram is up in heaven, and she is watching over us. She is going to show us through our days and keep us out of harms way. She will watch over her great great grandchildren as she did with her great grand children, grand children and her own children. We all love her so much and only have great things to say about this remarkable woman. She will always be my hero, but now my hero has traded her 3 wheeled bike for a pair of angel wings. I love you Gram. Please protect us.